Ever been in a situation where you thought everything was fine with your friends or family and then you notice a change in their treatment toward you? What exactly do you do? You try to reach out and find out what you did wrong, so that you can RIGHT your wrongs. You are willing to apologize for what it is you have done, but are clueless about it.
In Matthew 18 verses 15-16 it states “Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.” So when there is a conflict, you must talk directly with that person who you have a conflict with and try to resolve it. If not, try to resolve it with witnesses so that the words spoken are being held accountable for. You cannot solve any conflict by telling every other person the problem you have and not even mentioning it to the person with whom you have conflict with. Which brings me to my next point.
How, then, are we supposed to correct our own faults if no one tells us the faults that we have and we don’t see? In Luke 6:42 it states “How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye’, when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” When someone is willing to help you correct your own faults, they must also correct themselves. But there is nothing wrong with someone bringing to your attention something you could correct, especially when you are willing to change yourself (because you can’t change someone else).
Next, I am speaking on Proverbs 10:18 “Whoever conceals hatred with lying lips and spreads slander is a fool”. This is a major issue in the world today. Instead of coming to the person one has a problem with and trying to help them see their wrongs and faults while also correcting themselves, they spread lies and slander others. However, sometimes there is nothing you can do about a situation, but pray. I have come to the conclusion that, no matter what jealousy, anger, strife, or hatred may come against me, I have learned to love the verse in Proverbs 10:12 that says, “Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs.”
Sometimes these issues are out of your hands, but there are the previous steps that I have taken to overcome it all. First, I have tried to reach out and apologize, providing a way for others to see I am willing to correct my mistakes. When that fails, I have tried to step back and view myself, see what I can change about me and what I may have done to hurt someone. Then, I have seen that me keeping these issues between me and that person (while also taking it to God and praying about it) helps me to be in a better peace, knowing I have not slandered or spread lies about the issue. Finally, I know I cannot overcome anything with conflict, anger, jealousy, strife or hatred, but I can love without any of these things on my heart.
I hope this encourages you to not be down about a conflict that may be facing you today. If a conflict is still left unresolved and you’ve done everything you can to make amends, don’t feel bad. You can live knowing this won’t be something over your head. Change yourself and your wrongs and you will be leading by example all while coming out victorious!