“I’m Working On It”

Today’s post was supposed to be of my outline I wrote about five years ago and some of the topics I’d like to discuss on how to begin the healing process for those who have been abused.  The thing is, I forgot to print it out from my home computer!  Eek!  Well, there’s always tomorrow.  I guess that’s part of my busy, crazy life!  I’m working on it.  See you tomorrow! 


Poetry Time, My Heart on the Lines! Explanation

If you’ve read yesterday’s post, you know I was going to post the explanation to my poem.  Usually I don’t share the true meaning of my poems because they hold some personal issues, but I have become comfortable sharing my past hurts and emotions lately.  I know there are others out there that also have the same hurts and issues I have and I want us to band together and help each other overcome!  Some things are past feelings, some are new.  The poem is a mixture of emotions!  Below is the meaning…

Have you seen her?literal.

The one with the brown eyes, you get so lost inside?A good friend of mine once told me my eyes were mysterious and they held a deep story, so I stuck with it.

With negativity that sits on her left and her right side?Negative people and their comments have always surrounded me in my life.  Most of the time, I was talked to in a negative way.

Crushing the existence of the innocence she once held? – Negative put downs of my dreams and aspirations.  Crushing my hopes and beliefs that anything is possible.

Fighting her through others from the words they expel? – People used negative words so much, so it always seemed like I was fighting others off.

The one frightened by all of the pain she might cause? – Afraid I’m going to hurt others by my true feelings and opinions.

Because of the hurt she never dealt with, still at a loss? – Many painful events in my life, some I never dealt with, still feeling like I win, with a bunch of losses.

Angry, hurthing others with the solitude she loves? – Loving to be alone because it brings out all of my creativity, but then because I would rather not deal with the STUPIDITY.

Painting a picture every time she’s around loved ones? – Not really telling the truth about my whole story, leaving a lot of painful details out because no one would ever understand anyway.

Reality is fiction, but to others, vice versa? – My reality is fiction, but to others they think it’s all reality.

Thoughts of another, possibly Formosa? – Wanting to leave to a distant place, somewhere I’ve never been.  The city Formosa in Argentina.

The one who’s made up her mind to love at a distance? – Having tried to reach out to others and even do “their thing” while still being judged because of my religious choices.  While I do care about them, I’d rather love them from a distance because I’m not going to judge or be judged.

With a future void of any negative persistence? – Negativity can’t be escaped, but someone who is constantly negative or persistent with negativity is not and will not be in my future.

Have you seen her? – There are many like me; people who haven’t dealt with some or all of their issues and they go unnoticed.  Meaning, have you seen them too?

**Tomorrow’s Post:  An outline I wrote about 5 years ago.  It’s specific for those who have been abused physically, emotionally, or sexually, male or female.  Share it with those you feel could use a healing process.**

Poetry Time, My Heart on the Lines!

Have you seen her? 

The one with the smile?

The one with the brown eyes, you get so lost inside?

With negativity that sits on her left and her right side?

Crushing the existence of the innocence she once held?

Fighting her through others from the words they expel?

The one frightened by all of the pain she might cause?

Because of the hurt she never dealt with, still at a loss?

Angry, hurthing others with the solitude she loves?

Painting a picture every time she’s around loved ones?

Reality is fiction, but to others, vice versa?

Thoughts of another, possibly Formosa?

The one who’s made up her mind to love at a distance?

With a future void of any negative persistence?

Have you seen her?


**Tomorrow’s post: Explanation of poem + 1**

Is That A Plank In MY Eye???

Matthew 7:1-5  “Judge not, that you be not judged.  2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. 3 And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? 5 Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Have you ever been in a situation where you just KNEW you were right?  That happens to all of us.  I am not perfect and I don’t try to act like I am, but there are times when you are tested and you choose to deal with the situation in the not so “Christian” way.  You get attitudes, you roll your eyes, you say things in a short, rude way and don’t think twice about it.  Does it make it right?  Absolutely not.  Whether you are right or wrong.  We often feel that because we are right, we have the right to treat others however we want to.  Hypocrite! is right!  Just because we may have been right about something, doesn’t mean we should judge the situation or person according to our rights.  We have to open our eyes and let God show us that we are not perfect and that we are not right to judge others because they may not see the same views as us. 

We are to be kind to one another.  So, even if you are right, don’t treat the other as if they are nothing, but love them.  If you have acted out of character, apologize.  It’s better to have apologized for your actions, then to hold onto something that is not even worth holding onto.  I have been guilty of it, many times, and God has shown me through this recent incident to “9 Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. 10 Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another; 11 not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord;” Romans 12:9-11. 

I know this may seem that it’s meant for you, but really, I wrote this because this is what God has convicted me of last night.  I did what needed to be done and I feel good about it, although it wasn’t easy.  I thank God for humbleness when I could have done the opposite.  I will think twice about my actions and be kind whenever I speak.  I am sharing this with you in hopes that you will look over your actions and let God search your heart and reveal to you what it is you can change or improve.  We are all human and make mistakes, but God CAN and ALWAYS makes it right! 

What a heart-warming story! I encourage you to read this! I can’t even imagine, but what I love most is that this once homeless, amazing 6 year old has a chance at a better life!

Raising 5 Kids With Disabilities and Remaining Sane Blog


The above description fit me perfectly.

Yes, me… perfectly.

Marie came to live with us at the age of 6.  She had been picked up off the street at 4 in the morning, barefoot, in her underwear, looking for food.  We took her in as an emergency foster placement because I knew American Sign Language and Marie was deaf. She looked like a wild animal…disheveled, matted hair, flaming eyes of distrust, so filthy everywhere that even an hour in the tub did not wash off all the grime.  Her teeth were dingy yellow, and her body was emaciated.  Being the “good” middle class mother that I was, I cleaned her as best I could and then I took her to buy some clothes.

In the store, she immediately disappeared.  I impulsively called her name, (as though she could hear me.)  When I finally found her, she was in the candy aisle, shoving candy bars into…

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Amazing Kids!

Who has the most amazing kids in the world?  As a parent, you are probably saying to yourself right now, “I have the most amazing kids in the world!”  Even if we KNOW our kids may not actually ACT like the most amazing kids in the world, they sure do put something special in our hearts that will make us feel like they are.  Now I’m sure some people who don’t have kids or don’t even want kids are saying, “You are crazy for ever wanting or having kids!” The truth is, they’re right.  No sane person could want kids, but that’s what makes it so much more fun!  Of course they start off as babies, crying all night long, stinking up your house with those loaded diapers, and depriving you of your sleep. Then growing older and asking for the latest trends, growing less interested in us, and eventually moving on.   I can hear other comments like “Why would you want to raise your children in such a horrible world?”  But the truth is, we raise our children in a crazy world because we have the hope that we’ll raise a child who will one day change the world.  We actually have the power to do that!  Of course not every child we raise is going to be 100% perfect, but we can raise them with the right values and teach them to achieve their goals and dreams.

I commend anyone who is a parent and trying their best to make the best of their children and their lives.  We all may have different backgrounds and views on life as well as different income levels, which also makes having children all the more difficult.  And I am not here to judge anyone who makes a less than decent living with children, espeicailly if they are trying.  I know of a few friends of mine that had children on great incomes and careers, only to lose it all and people judge them saying “You should have never had kids if you couldn’t care for them.”  If that’s the case, then no one should have kids because if you have actually had to go through any type of struggle, you know that nothing in life is ever guarunteed.  That’s another story, but my point is, as a parent, it comes with all types of struggles and successes that are all worth it. 

Parents, we have to stick together and make this a better world for the generations to come!  We can all make a point to improve somewhere because after all, they are just kids!  Kids who are amazing, with or without disabilities, all warm, beautiful smiles and an innocence that makes us remember the times we had no troubles, even if just for a moment.  So if you’re a parent, grab your children, hug them, hug them tight.  Love them, tell them you love them, read them a story, play the game you have been promising them to play, watch the movie they have been begging you to watch with them, and simply remember that having some amazing kids really starts with you! 

It Is Time!

Sharing these videos with you because they are some of the songs that I have turned to in some of my darkest hours. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do. Out of Eden – Meditate, Anthony Evans – Revelation Song, and Natalie Grant – I Am Not Alone.

During the last almost 10 years of my life, me and my husband have endured some many hardships. Including financially, spiritually, emotionally, and in our marriage. We have always been close and never really had any marital problems that were threatening to our marriage until about 3 years ago. It has since been resolved and we have been living our life happily while still working out our financial areas. We have always been blessed to have a place to live, whether it be our own place or family. We haven’t always had the best jobs, hence our decision to go to school. Which is now going on our third year. My husband graduated last October with his Associates Degree in Medical Billing and is now into his Bachelor’s Degree for Business Management. I begin my last class for my Associates Degree in Web Design next week and end March 31. I then begin classes for my Bachelor’s program in Business Management. I am sharing this with you because it has not been an easy journey. From many difficult things to raising children, and even having some people who say they are close to you, talk, do, and say evil, nasty things about you. I will not share exact details, but something we have been praying for has finally come into our lives and seems like our entire situation could be turned around! I want to tell you that if you would just hold on a little longer, it’s going to happen for you! Don’t give up hope, no matter what it is! Claim it in Jesus’ Name and it shall be done! Matthew 21:21-22 says 21 Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done. 22 If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.”